“All the lonely people…where do they all come from?”

“Single, White Male”

There was once a graying old guy
Who decided to give love a try.
So, he posted an ad
That said “Lonely and sad,”
But no ladies would ever reply.

(The limerick above also appears here: https://paulwhitberg.wordpress.com/2014/05/29/5-limericks-a-day-to-keep-the-dr-away-by-paul-oburgess/)

“Raise your glasses to Teacher!”

There was once a man whose career
Induced him to drink lots of beer.
Whenever he’d teach,
There were bottles in reach
To help him endure his career.

“Drunk as a Monk”

There was once a lonely old monk
Who deep in depression had sunk.
“My time I’ll not waste
On being so chaste,”
He said once when exceedingly drunk.

“Life Stinks!”

There was once an old man who was French.
He disgusted his friends with his stench.
They avoided that bloke,
Who was making them choke,
When they saw him reclined on a bench.

“A Tailor-made Man”

A man was once full of despair
Because for him no one did care.
So he bought some new clothes
And then started to pose
As a man for whom others would care.

5 limericks by Paul Burgess

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9 thoughts on ““All the lonely people…where do they all come from?”

  1. mbarkersimpson

    A handful of fine limericks! My favourite was raise your glasses – I often feel that way and the imagery is magnificent. Life stinks is hilarious in a different kind of way, that one too stood out visually.

    Like

    Reply
    1. paulwhitberg Post author

      “Raise Your Glasses” was partly inspired by a teacher I had and partly inspired by something I contemplated (but never did) during my time as a college instructor. Limericks continue to be my favorite poems to write. A few days ago, I even wrote a “How-to” guide on writing limericks [https://paulwhitberg.wordpress.com/2014/06/09/how-to-write-limericks-a-brief-introduction-to-poetic-form/]

      Thank you for reading and commenting!

      Like

      Reply

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