“Absurd’s the Word”

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There’s a person whose greatest of joys
Is attempting whatever annoys.
Like a horse, he will neigh*
And oppose all you say
While he’s boasting of days he destroys.

*a pun, of course, on “nay”.

A drunkard’s devising a plan
To ingest all the beer that he can.
On the river he’ll float
Without using a boat,
For he’ll soon be so buoyant a man.

There was an old man on a plane
Whose behavior was wholly insane.
He removed all his clothes
And then sucked on his toes.
‘Til the pilot had landed in Spain.

A man who enjoyed a good laugh
Decided to buy a giraffe.
When struck by its tongue,
He punctured a lung
And found it more painful to laugh.

There was once a grumpy old owl
Who regarded all men with a scowl
To describe her in words,
It was said by some birds
She “was foul as the foulest of fowl*.”

*chicken-like bird; owls are not considered fowl

5 limericks by Paul Burgess

 

 

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